First off, it isn’t “I Restaurant”, it is “iRestaurant”. That is initially what struck me about the place. Apple is nearby, and makes all sorts of ‘i’ stuff - iPod, iMovie, iMac, etc. When we drove by, I thought, “iRestaurant, what does that mean?” Over the next couple weeks we noticed a bunch of interesting looking restaurants, so we decided to try them all and report back. But since iRestaurant was the one that caught my eye first, it became our first stop.
[And once we actually went to the restaurant, and were close to the sign out front, I noticed that the dot of the i is actually a heart, so perhaps it is “i heart Restaurant”? There was also some kanji on the sign, with what looked to me like a very stylized “love” at the top of the symbol, which for me, sort of reinforced my “i heart Restaurant” theory. I didn’t ask though.]
I also need to say that when you read B1, you’re getting a very stylized (and I’d argue not all that accurate) picture of me talking. I read the quotes he attributes to me, and always think, I don’t talk like that, I don’t use those phrases or words or swear that much. So hey, take it with a grain of salt. “Baggin-n-saggin t-shirt outfits” - WTF? I had on jeans and a t-shirt both of which fit. Maybe B1 was baggin-n-saggin, but I sure wasn’t.
As always, lunch with B1 is a learning experience. The Mutant Disco playing in his car had some good tunes I was familiar with, though I mistakenly identified the instrumental that was on when I got in as some Devo or derivative number. I also learned about (and experienced, a pizza hut turn, parking hollywood style, and riding jfk style - yeah.)
I should have taken notes and photos. I’ll figure this out as I go along. My first stop at iRestaurant was the restroom. It had some crazy fancy sinks, and an electric trash can. Why an electric trash can? I’m not sure. Perhaps everyone has an electric trash can these days and I’m just living in the dark ages. It threw me off for a second when I turned to throw away my paper towel. The lid was closed and there was some sort of control panel on top of the canister. Upon closer inspection, there were two buttons, “open” and “close” with what looked like a little LED between them. The LED was off, or blank, or perhaps not an LED at all, but it made me think that the trashcan was off, or not plugged in. “How will I get this thing open if the power is off?” It also crossed my mind that maybe it was a paper shredder (whoa, these guys are so high tech they shred their paper towels), or maybe an incinerator. Eventually I pressed “open” and the lid silently and smoothly opened. I tossed my towel, pressed “close” and went back to our table.
I join B1 at our table. There is a one page, two-sided lunch menu that lists 60? 80? choices for lunch. B1 is going through the dinner? menu, which is a huge binder with pictures. He’s trying to get me to order something insane. I decline. The owner (or at least someone who seems to have some elevated status in the restaurant) comes over to see what we want to drink. B1 goes for a coke, I ask for some tea and a glass of water. I never got the glass of water, which is the only bad thing I can really say about the whole experience. I also ask him about one of the dishes on the menu, but it comes with shrimp (and I don’t like seafood), so I tell him I want to peruse the menu a bit more.
On the one hand, I feel like I should order something I’ve had at lots of other Chinese restaurants, like Mongolian Beef. That way I could compare it to other places and say - the best Mongolian Beef ever, or 7/10 on the Mongolian Beef scale. The menu however, had lots of choices, many of which I’m not familiar with. So I decided to go with something that I’d never had before, but not too far out there. I think it was called “shredded pork with garlic sauce”. It was the first thing on the menu, and I figured that was as good a place to start as any.
As you’ve probably read and seen below, B1 ordered an appetizer of “magic flavored fish”. It turned out to be a plate of peanuts with little fried bits of fish. I like tuna, but not much else out of the water, but figure I’ll give it a shot. Deep fried fish bits might be good. Turns out they’re not. They are nasty. The peanuts look like they’ve got some seasoning on them, so I try a few. The seasoning isn’t very strong, they taste pretty much like plain peanuts. On the whole, this dish isn’t for me. It may have been the most exquisitely made “magic flavored fish”, but I wouldn’t know. It was weird however, and that was good. When I go to a restaurant I don’t want some watered down Americanized version of the food, I want the real thing. I suspect this was the real thing, which just happens to not be for me. (Or maybe it is just some made up nonsense to make people like me think we’re getting the real thing. For all I know the cooks in the back were on the floor in hysterics - “they ordered the magic flavored fish, bwa-ha-ha, what should we serve them? I don’t know, fry up these fish scraps and mix it with some peanuts”) The most odd thing however was the plastic spoon. The restaurant is pretty fancy and nice. The food came on nice china. Why a plastic spoon? Not sure. Maybe the magic is too intense for metal.
Our food showed up shortly after. The lotus root on B1's dish looks cool. Weird. I try one and it tastes like a water chestnut, but with a bit of kick at the end. I though they were great. My dish was good, but not exactly what I was hoping for. The pork definitely wasn’t shredded. It was just little pieces of pork. The sauce wasn’t all that garlicky. It was supposed to be spicy, but it wasn’t. It was good, just not what I was expecting.
There were at least a couple big flat panels playing music videos (the music was either off or on very low - so they weren’t distracting and didn't interfere with conversation). Some of them were corny, or just Chinese versions of some already bad American music video. A few however, were out of this world. Stunning visually, funny, interesting - all with no sound. They were super.
Our bill was $18 something, which on reflection seems too low. I thought each of our lunch specials was at least $6.99, which means the magic flavored fish plus a coke and a pot of tea (and no glass of water) would only be $4, which seems too low. Once again, notes would have helped here. Next time. Maybe you get a drink with the lunch special?
You might think I’d be down on this restaurant, but I’m not. I thought it was a great place. The dishes we ordered didn’t wow me, but I will say that everything seemed really fresh and of the highest quality. I suspect there is something on the menu that will knock my socks off, it will just take a few trips to find it. The restaurant was very nice and the owners seem to being trying hard to create a high quality place. There was a lot of attention to detail at iRestaurant - it is miles away from your typical Chinese greasy spoon.
[And once we actually went to the restaurant, and were close to the sign out front, I noticed that the dot of the i is actually a heart, so perhaps it is “i heart Restaurant”? There was also some kanji on the sign, with what looked to me like a very stylized “love” at the top of the symbol, which for me, sort of reinforced my “i heart Restaurant” theory. I didn’t ask though.]
I also need to say that when you read B1, you’re getting a very stylized (and I’d argue not all that accurate) picture of me talking. I read the quotes he attributes to me, and always think, I don’t talk like that, I don’t use those phrases or words or swear that much. So hey, take it with a grain of salt. “Baggin-n-saggin t-shirt outfits” - WTF? I had on jeans and a t-shirt both of which fit. Maybe B1 was baggin-n-saggin, but I sure wasn’t.
As always, lunch with B1 is a learning experience. The Mutant Disco playing in his car had some good tunes I was familiar with, though I mistakenly identified the instrumental that was on when I got in as some Devo or derivative number. I also learned about (and experienced, a pizza hut turn, parking hollywood style, and riding jfk style - yeah.)
I should have taken notes and photos. I’ll figure this out as I go along. My first stop at iRestaurant was the restroom. It had some crazy fancy sinks, and an electric trash can. Why an electric trash can? I’m not sure. Perhaps everyone has an electric trash can these days and I’m just living in the dark ages. It threw me off for a second when I turned to throw away my paper towel. The lid was closed and there was some sort of control panel on top of the canister. Upon closer inspection, there were two buttons, “open” and “close” with what looked like a little LED between them. The LED was off, or blank, or perhaps not an LED at all, but it made me think that the trashcan was off, or not plugged in. “How will I get this thing open if the power is off?” It also crossed my mind that maybe it was a paper shredder (whoa, these guys are so high tech they shred their paper towels), or maybe an incinerator. Eventually I pressed “open” and the lid silently and smoothly opened. I tossed my towel, pressed “close” and went back to our table.
I join B1 at our table. There is a one page, two-sided lunch menu that lists 60? 80? choices for lunch. B1 is going through the dinner? menu, which is a huge binder with pictures. He’s trying to get me to order something insane. I decline. The owner (or at least someone who seems to have some elevated status in the restaurant) comes over to see what we want to drink. B1 goes for a coke, I ask for some tea and a glass of water. I never got the glass of water, which is the only bad thing I can really say about the whole experience. I also ask him about one of the dishes on the menu, but it comes with shrimp (and I don’t like seafood), so I tell him I want to peruse the menu a bit more.
On the one hand, I feel like I should order something I’ve had at lots of other Chinese restaurants, like Mongolian Beef. That way I could compare it to other places and say - the best Mongolian Beef ever, or 7/10 on the Mongolian Beef scale. The menu however, had lots of choices, many of which I’m not familiar with. So I decided to go with something that I’d never had before, but not too far out there. I think it was called “shredded pork with garlic sauce”. It was the first thing on the menu, and I figured that was as good a place to start as any.
As you’ve probably read and seen below, B1 ordered an appetizer of “magic flavored fish”. It turned out to be a plate of peanuts with little fried bits of fish. I like tuna, but not much else out of the water, but figure I’ll give it a shot. Deep fried fish bits might be good. Turns out they’re not. They are nasty. The peanuts look like they’ve got some seasoning on them, so I try a few. The seasoning isn’t very strong, they taste pretty much like plain peanuts. On the whole, this dish isn’t for me. It may have been the most exquisitely made “magic flavored fish”, but I wouldn’t know. It was weird however, and that was good. When I go to a restaurant I don’t want some watered down Americanized version of the food, I want the real thing. I suspect this was the real thing, which just happens to not be for me. (Or maybe it is just some made up nonsense to make people like me think we’re getting the real thing. For all I know the cooks in the back were on the floor in hysterics - “they ordered the magic flavored fish, bwa-ha-ha, what should we serve them? I don’t know, fry up these fish scraps and mix it with some peanuts”) The most odd thing however was the plastic spoon. The restaurant is pretty fancy and nice. The food came on nice china. Why a plastic spoon? Not sure. Maybe the magic is too intense for metal.
Our food showed up shortly after. The lotus root on B1's dish looks cool. Weird. I try one and it tastes like a water chestnut, but with a bit of kick at the end. I though they were great. My dish was good, but not exactly what I was hoping for. The pork definitely wasn’t shredded. It was just little pieces of pork. The sauce wasn’t all that garlicky. It was supposed to be spicy, but it wasn’t. It was good, just not what I was expecting.
There were at least a couple big flat panels playing music videos (the music was either off or on very low - so they weren’t distracting and didn't interfere with conversation). Some of them were corny, or just Chinese versions of some already bad American music video. A few however, were out of this world. Stunning visually, funny, interesting - all with no sound. They were super.
Our bill was $18 something, which on reflection seems too low. I thought each of our lunch specials was at least $6.99, which means the magic flavored fish plus a coke and a pot of tea (and no glass of water) would only be $4, which seems too low. Once again, notes would have helped here. Next time. Maybe you get a drink with the lunch special?
You might think I’d be down on this restaurant, but I’m not. I thought it was a great place. The dishes we ordered didn’t wow me, but I will say that everything seemed really fresh and of the highest quality. I suspect there is something on the menu that will knock my socks off, it will just take a few trips to find it. The restaurant was very nice and the owners seem to being trying hard to create a high quality place. There was a lot of attention to detail at iRestaurant - it is miles away from your typical Chinese greasy spoon.
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